You Should Have Seen…

Say What?

Would you….?

book tickets online at CheapOAir? I’m not even checking this real online ad; some items aren’t worth discount price searching in my book.

What do you think?

Pix is just my imagination wondering what COA flies.

Good gravy, Gertrude.

Suspicious in NM

See Steve Allen link at "Who Said What?"

Steve Allen at "Who said what"


Steve Allen, a major American humorist, kept people in stitches for years and he wasn't even a doctor.

Or a male seamtress.

Though he is gone now, he left behind a treasury of comic knowledge that he wrote in books that we still can find copies of if we are lucky.

If you like humor, his literary legacy is a humor mine worth prospecting in.
I'll even sign my name to this post to personally endorse what I have written here.

Mr. Bob Hoff

First Lady marks International Women’s Day with Hillary ‘President’ joke

In a fitting show of solidarity for International Women's Day, First Lady Michelle Obama and Secretary of State Hillary Clinton made light of the brutal 2008 battle Clinton conducted to defeat Barack Obama for the Democratic presidential nomination. As Michelle Obama launched a State Department commemoration of International Women's Day, she briefly stumbled over Clinton's job title. "Let me thank my dear friend, Senator - Secretary Clinton. I almost said, 'President Clinton,' " said the first lady to laughter and applause. "But let me thank you for that kind introduction, and most of all thank you for your friendship, thank you for your support, and thank you for your indispensable advice in getting me through this first year and helping me figure out how to get my family settled in our new life in D.C."

The exchange stood as another rebuke to a favored theme of the Beltway pundit set: that tensions between the Obamas and the Secretary of State still run high. More than that, though, the series of events that the first lady presided over drew wider attention to the stubborn lags in gender equality beyond the developed Western world. Both women stressed this issue in their respective speeches. As Secretary Clinton put it, the world "can't solve problems of financial crisis, climate change, disease and poverty if half of the population is left behind."

Monday marked the 100th anniversary of International Women's Day. The day doesn't get a great deal of attention within the United States, but many other countries honor it with a national holiday. Nations that officially honor it are far flung, ranging from China and Russia to Macedonia and Vietnam. Some countries will encourage men to lavish gifts on the women in their lives, in the tradition of greeting-card holidays like Father's Day and Mother's Day. Other countries promote women-only commemorations of the day, with all-female parties and dinners.

The first lady also picked up on these ideas of stronger public recognition for women in her remarks on Monday, when the White House hosted its own event marking the importance of the March 8th holiday. "I get to speak while he stands and watches," the first lady announced, as the president looked on. She then told the president, "Look at me adoringly," to laughter from the crowd. He obliged with the reply, "I can do that"-whereupon she mock-chided him with the follow-up command, "With sincerity."

More, including video

The Mighty Boosh

A British comedy group rising to great popularity in Britian and parts of USA.

"Electro" episode by The Mighty Boosh at adultswim.com

The Mighty Boosh is a British comedy troupe featuring comedians Julian Barratt and Noel Fielding. Developed from three stage shows and a six episode radio series, it has since spawned a total of twenty television episodes for BBC Three and two live tours of the UK, as well as two live shows in the United States. (Wikipedia)

History



Fielding first met Barratt after seeing him perform his solo stand-up routine at the Hellfire Comedy Club in the Wycombe Swan theatre.[1] The pair soon found that they shared comic interests, formed a double act, and "decided to be the new Goodies".[2] After their first performance together at a bar in London in April 1998, Barratt and Fielding developed their zookeeper characters - Howard Moon and Vince Noir, respectively - in a series of sketches for Paramount Comedy’s Unnatural Acts. It was here that they also met American Rich Fulcher, who became Bob Fossil. Fielding’s friend Dave Brown and Fielding's brother Michael also became regular collaborators. Richard Ayoade was another original cast member, playing the role of adventurer Dixon Bainbridge, though he was later replaced by Matt Berry in the first television series, since he was under contract with Channel 4.[3] Ayoade returned in the second and third series as a belligerent shaman named Saboo.


From the Wikia Entertainment webpage,[4] the title "The Mighty Boosh" comes from a comment Noel heard about his brother's hair by a Portuguese friend "When he was young, he had really curly hair and his little friend when he was five used to say 'You've got a mighty bush!', (but his accent made "bush" sound like "boosh"). I thought it was funny, I just overheard them say that once and thought 'Mighty boosh, that's quite cool.' We didn't want to be Barratt and Fielding, that sounds dreadful."
(Ibid)

The Mighty Boosh at Wikipedia

The Mighty Boosh at Internet Movie Database

Dogs dressed as Superheroes

 (Trumpets blasting madly in the background for)
Lobster Dog 

AAAAAANNNNNNNNNDDDDDDD……..


Super Husky




See more?

Note: The Huffington Post, the website source for this “piece,” stands as a great source for all kinds of daily information. Check it out closely, y’all.
Bob H.

The Huffington Post

P.S.--Caution: since these are dog superheroes look up in the sky as they fly over at your own risk. We do not entertain requests for payments for facial dry cleaning. The Mgt.

Drew Carey

Drew Allison Carey (born May 23, 1958) is an American comedian, actor, photographer, and game show host. After serving in the U.S. Marines and making a name for himself in stand-up comedy, Carey eventually gained popularity starring on his own sitcom, The Drew Carey Show, and serving as host on the U.S. version of Whose Line Is It Anyway?, both of which aired on ABC.

Carey has appeared in several  films, television series, music videos, a made-for-television film, and a computer game. He is interested in and involved with a variety of sports and has worked as a photographer at U.S. National Team soccer games, and is currently a minority owner of the Major League Soccer team Seattle Sounders FC. Carey currently is engaged and has written an autobiography detailing his early life and television career. Carey currently hosts the game show The Price Is Right, which airs on CBS.

From WIkipedia.org

Read more?

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

DREW Carey wants to save his hometown of Cleveland.

In an upcoming series of online videos, the Price Is Right host suggests remedies to the city’s many problems — population loss, failing schools, lack of economic spark.

Carey argues for less government, more competition and less taxes to revitalize Cleveland in 10-minute segments that are scheduled to begin appearing next week on the reason.tv website. It’s affiliated with the Reason Foundation, a nonpartisan, libertarian-leaning organization which has Carey has a board member

Read More?

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Drew Carey Quotes at Brainy Quote

++++

If you get the chance, catch episodes of the old Drew Carey show—Your Blog Host-Bob H.

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Drew Carey at Imdb.com

Three Women in Mexico

Received this email from a relative--

Three women go down to Mexico one night to celebrate college graduation.
       Apparently someone slipped something into their drinks, and they woke up in jail, only to find that they are to be executed in the morning, though none of them can remember what they did the night before.
       The first one, a brunette, is strapped in the electric chair and is asked if she has any last words. She says, 'I just graduated from Trinity Bible College and believe in the Almighty power of God to intervene on the behalf of the innocent.' They throw the switch and nothing happens. They all immediately fall to the floor on their knees, beg for forgiveness, and release her.
       The second one, another brunette, is strapped in and gives her last words... 'I just graduated from the Harvard School of Law and I believe in the power of justice to intervene on the part of the innocent.' They throw the switch and again, nothing happens. Again they all immediately fall to their knees, beg for forgiveness and release her.
       The last one (you knew it), a blonde, is strapped in and says, 'Well, I'm from the University of Tennessee and just graduated with a degree in Electrical Engineering, and I'll tell ya right now, y'all ain't gonna electrocute nobody if someone don't plug this thing in.

Grumpy Grandpa Bob?

On occasion, I am called "grumps" by certain family members. Look at the real "grump pix above (plus that women?) and see me and Jimi's pup "Hulk" in third row.


Any relationship between sweet-souled Grandpa Bob and the REAL DEAL Grumpy?


I don't think so, you all, thank you very much!


Snow White at Wiki

Songs for the 1960s updated for 2010

3/5/2010 4:22:27 PM

Thanks, Mario (my brother-in-law, friend, and fellow philosopher/problem fixer, who lives down the street; thanks for sharing your humor e-mail with moi.

Bobby Darin ---
Splish, Splash, I Was Havin' A Flash

Mrs. Brown, You've Got A LovelyWalker

Ringo Starr ---
I Get By With A Little Help From Depends
The Bee Gees -- -
How Can You Mend A Broken Hip?

Roberta Flack---
The First Time Ever I Forgot Your Face

Johnny Nash ---
I Can't See Clearly Now.

The Commodores ---
Once, Twice, Three Times To the Bathroom

Marvin Gaye ---
Heard It Through the Grape Nuts

Procol Harem---
A Whiter Shade of Hair

Leo Sayer ---
You Make Me Feel Like Napping
The Temptations ---
Papa's Got A Kidney Stone

Abba---
Denture Queen
"You haven't seen my teeth have you Wilma?

Tony Orlando ---
Knock 3 Times On The Ceiling If You Hear Me Fall

Helen Reddy ---
I Am Woman, Hear Me Snore

Leslie Gore---
It's My Procedure, And I'll Cry If I Want To

And Last but NOT least...
Willie Nelson ---
On the Commode Again

Chubby Checkers

C’mon Everybody, Let’s Colonoscopy

Again!!

Note: Last one by me—Bob H :O)

I would do another one, but just as my creativity kicked in for the bit of humor above (my man Chubby), it suddenly left without even as much as a by your leave, Bob

Drat—and turn the engines completely off.

“This little piggy killed his father”

Now that I am older…

 

This is so true for me—spending most of my time looking for things I just had a minute ago.

Four Stages of Life

 

At least this isn’t made in China…one fruit's origin

 Click on image to enlarge it and see where this one was made.





Which brings us this question: why does Walmart sell it”

For you serious scholars of fruits and their origins, why do you think that Mr. Pepper is standing so close to Miss Banana.

Hint: Mr. Pepper  is locked is a glass prison and Miss Banana hasn't even shed her peel yet today.

Answer: I have no idea. Gotta go now; the boss is coming.

Hulk, the miniature bull terrier, in his San Antonio Spurs Tim Duncan t-shirt

The shirts is a hand-me-down from JimivicK. Darren is the only person on his block to have a dog with an National Basketball Association San Antonio Spurs replica playing jersey.
Grandpa Bob wants a Jersey like Hulk’s, but larger, XXXXXXXL  :O)
Those of you who saw Hulk at Facebook when he arrived at Darren and his son's home in October 2009 can see that he is growing without any canine hesitation.
He is a big dawg and his puppy teeth are still as sharp as ever He loves to chase his tail in circles (a feature of this breed) and when tired of not catching the elusive appendage will lay down and puppy sigh. I swear we hear that ps.

I remember this book…now anyway!

This is a wonderfully written book by Dr. Wayne Dyer, Change Your Thoughts, Change Your Life. It is Dyer's interpretation of the TAO (or the DAO) as some people call it, a 2500 yr-old philosophy written by Lao Tze (or so many people believe).
I enjoyed it very much and have bought and read several other interpretations of it by other authors. I enjoyed and liked it so much that I gave a copy of it to my sister and two brothers for Christmas 2008.
I like to give books to them for special occasions, so for Christmas 2009, I gave them each a book again. That was the good news; the bad news was that I gave each of them another copy of Change Your Thoughts, Change Your Life.
Yes, my memory slipped, a not uncommon occurrence during these five years of retirement (and before). For a remedy for memory slippages, I read somewhere that eating blueberries is excellent, a strategy only thwarted by the ever-increasing price of those little bluish suckers.
Now I hope that my siblings know not to plan on receiving a copy of Change Your Thoughts, Change Your Life for Christmas 2010 or any large containers of blueberries (maybe I should gift them a copy of this blog post to make sure?)
Ironically, I tried to give them a book about improving thinking and life and I stumbled on my memory.

Constant Dinner Location vs. Variable Lifestyles

From two Utah Friends, a married couple--K and L—thanks for sharing; the pix at the very bottom is moi, though I am not 80 yet.

A group of 40 year old buddies discussed where they should meet for dinner. Finally it was agreed upon that they should meet at the Ocean View restaurant because the waitresses there had low cut blouses and were very young.

10 years later at 50 years of age, the group once again discussed where they should meet for dinner. Finally it was agreed that they should meet at the Ocean View restaurant because the food there was very good and the wine selection was good also.

10 years later at 60 years of age, the group once again discussed where they should meet for dinner. Finally it was agreed that they should meet at the Ocean View restaurant because they could eat there in peace and quiet and the restaurant had a beautiful view of the ocean.

10 years later, at 70 years of age, the group once again discussed where they should meet for dinner. Finally it was agreed that they should meet at the Ocean View restaurant because the restaurant was wheel chair accessible and they even had an elevator.

10 years later, at 80 years of  age, the group once again discussed where they should meet for dinner. Finally it was agreed that they should meet at the Ocean View restaurant because they had never been there before.

A Super-Retirement Job: Custom Book Rehabilitation/Mending with Duct Tape

For many people, Retirement (formerly, not too long ago, thought of as the

• 
  
   Golden Years or
• 
  
  Life in Paradise Valley
• 
  
  or at least on Easy Street,

or Hit the Road World-wide and Vacation Party),

Now, because of:

• 
  
  bankruptcy,
• 
  
  medical bills,
• 
  
  children still in college, high school, or grade school,
• 
  
  lost pension,
• 
  
  failure to plan,
• 
  
  company executives who absconded with all the pension funds etc.)

retirees must secure another job, if not full-time, at least part-time, and most importantly as the price of everything skyrockets, a paying job.

With job shortages, may of us have had to turn to job retraining, and for me, the choice was easy. I have always loved books, to work with my hands, loved to provide customized and individual and caring service, and have enjoyed a life-time hobby of creatively working with duct tape..

The duct tape book mending and repair service is a hot business opportunity just getting off the ground. Thousands of paying openings (100% with benefits), including hundreds in your home town go begging everyday for applicants who are trained.

After attending a basic twelve hour training course just down the street,  you too can be providing the services like I  recently performed on this dilapidated book, The International Dictionary of Thoughts, that as you can see, I have meticulously restored to mint condition.

By the way, this craft which dates back to the mid-Middle Ages only involves book rehabilitation with duct tape and doesn’t involvebooks on tape .

You will probably be surprised, as I was, to find out that value of this 12-hour course  is  $999. 50  but if you email them at restoringbookstomintcondition @ducttape.com, you will pay only $19.99 and they will supply the your first role of imported duct tape.

This is a limited time offer, so act now.

You won’t regret it.

Youngest C&W singer I have ever seen; cutest too

Toddler Musician

Somewhere there are some proud relatives, no?

…And then the fight started

From my friend:

…Shawn  (somewhere back East with a  beautiful baby daughter (works “outside” and ”inside” the home, Shawn, not the baby) and a husband who rangers for the National Park Service.

---

Saturday morning I got up early, quietly dressed, made my lunch, and slipped quietly into the garage. I hooked up the boat up to the van, and proceeded to back out into a torrential downpour.. The wind was blowing 50 mph, so I pulled back into the garage, turned on the radio, and discovered that the weather would be bad all day.

I went back into the house, quietly undressed, and slipped back into bed.  I cuddled up to my wife's back, now with a different anticipation, and whispered, "The weather out there is terrible."

My loving wife of 15 years replied, "Can you believe my stupid husband is out fishing in that?"
And then the fight started...
******************************************
I rear-ended a car this morning. So, there we were alongside the road and slowly the other driver got out of his car. You know how sometimes you just get soooo stressed and little things just seem funny? Yeah, well I couldn't believe it.  He was a DWARF! 

He stormed over to my car, looked up at me, and shouted, "I AM NOT HAPPY!"

So, I looked down at him and said, "Well, then, which one are you?"
And then the fight started.....
*****************************************
My wife was hinting about what she wanted for our upcoming anniversary. She said, 'I want something shiny that goes from 0 to 150 in about 3 seconds.'
I bought her a bathroom scale.
And then the fight started...
******************************************
After retiring, I went to the Social Security office to apply for Social Security. The woman behind the counter asked me for my driver's License to verify my age. I looked in my pockets and realized I had left my wallet at home. I told the woman that I was very sorry, but I would have to go home and come back later.

The woman said, 'Unbutton your shirt'. So I opened my shirt revealing my curly silver hair. She said, 'That silver hair on your chest is proof enough for me' and she processed my Social Security application..

When I got home, I excitedly told my wife about my experience at the Social Security office.
She said, 'You should have dropped your pants. You might have gotten disability, too.'
And then the fight started...
******************************************
My wife sat down on the seat next to me as I was flipping channels. She asked, 'What's on TV?'
I said, 'Dust.'
And then the fight started...
******************************************
My wife and I were watching "Who Wants To Be A Millionaire" while we were in bed. I turned to her and said, "Do you want to make love?"
"No," she answered.
I then said, "Is that your final answer?"
She didn't even look at me this time, simply saying, "Yes."
So I said, "Then I'd like to phone a friend."
And then the fight started....
******************************************
My wife and I were sitting at a table at my school reunion, and I kept staring at a drunken lady swigging her drink as she sat alone at a nearby table.
My wife asked, 'Do you know her?'
'Yes,' I sighed, 'She's my old girlfriend. I understand she took to drinking right after we split up those many years ago, and I hear she hasn't been sober since.'
'My goodness!' says my wife, 'who would think a person could go on celebrating that long?'
And then the fight started...
******************************************
I took my wife to a restaurant. The waiter, for some reason took my order first. "I'll have the steak, medium rare, please."
He said, "Aren't you worried about the mad cow?""
"Nah, she can order for herself."
And then the fight started...

The Perfect Marriage

Delete It, Baby, Delete It!

From: S.S



Thanks for sharing, my Friend

"I am not anti-business; I am anti-idiot"-- Scott Adams, satirist, cartoonist, creator of Dilbert

“I believe everyody in the world should have guns. Citizens should have bazookas and rocket launchers too. I believe that all citizens should have their weapons of choice. However, I also believe that only I should have the ammunition. Because frankly, I wouldn't trust the rest of the goobers with anything more dangerous than string.”

"Free will is an illusion. People always choose the perceived path of greatest pleasure"

"Informed decision-making comes from a long tradition of guessing and then blaming others for inadequate results"

Scott Adams

http://thinkexist.com/

(Then search "Scott Adams")







Scott Raymond Adams (born June 8, 1957) is the American creator of the Dilbert comic strip and the author of several nonfiction works of satire, commentary, business, and general speculation.
(Wikipedia)

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Scott_Adams



Read about this amazing cartoonist and satarist, creator of Dilbert

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dilbert

Wearing a paper bag over her head on a flight

1992--Sarah Ferguson wears paper bag over her head on airline ride

BrainyHistory Event

Sarah Ferguson at Wikipedia

Did you know that Sarah Ferguson was an author? See Wikipedia article above about her